And I "am" His...I am a child of God.... a Kings Kid... It wasnt all that long ago that I wasnt getting a dozen long stem beautiful roses for Valentines day. I remember some days (back in the day) that I wasnt acknowledging much of anything accept the deep life of shame I survived while sick and in the throes of active addiciton. Some people who have read my blog ask me why I continue bringing my old life up? why dont I move on and share just happy things? and I tell them I AM moving on... I do share the happy things in my life "because" Im in recovery.I am just committed to sharing those bad days to appreciate and perhaps be a vessel of hope and references for anyone who might "be' or have someone in their lives that are experiencing the life I once lived while sick with addiciton. Ive also been thanked both publicly and privately for using my experiences, I believe I was brought to it to get through it. and then share my message of hope.
There is no shame in putting a voice to addiction, the shame is keeping it hidden. Secrets grow in the dark and die in the light.
"This little light of mine? Im gonna let it shine, Im gonna let it shine on me!"
If I were still in the dark, I wouldnt be showing off the exquisite bouquet of roses my Valentine surprized me with. I wasnt always spoiled this way. I wanted to share with you the gratitude I feel in my heart for what God has done in my life and my husbands life. We are indeed blessed with uncommon favor and supernatural blessings everyday. The odds of both of us coming into recovery and remaining clean and sober for as long as we have and will continue to do, is a miracle. and you all KNOW how I feel about miracles!
Ive read some other blogs where the women were in a place in their relationships where they didnt want flowers, cards and candy because they were more appreciative of having gifts of home improvements, and thats awesome...but we dont own a home, we dont have much in terms of material items.. but we do have eachother, "so for me", someone whos not used to recieiving romantic expressions that have thorns, stems and pedals...I sure am happy. I sure am grateful am loved.
Dont get me wrong, my hubs is a very giving husband, Im not complaining, but he seldom succombs to wishy washy sentiments on holidays, hes more of a " "show & tell your wife you love her everyday" kinda guy....but for whatever reason today, buying me such beautiful roses was important for him. (& Im glad it was!)
I sure am grateful that I have a loving God in my life who saw fit to keep us alive AND together. So Happy Valentines Day to all my friends I consider my sisters....you all know who you are.