My Blog List

Thursday, August 26, 2010


Sitting here in front of our toasty fire pit the other night, sipping coffee,(slappin away some B-52 sized skeeters) I was reflecting on so many changes that have occured in my life during the past year. Last year at this time, I was healing from the first of 2 surgeries on my thumb from a nasty fall at the school I was working at. I returned for 2 days last September but have since resigned needing a second surgery from being forced to go back too early(because of politics) & getting an infection that attacked the wound & surrounding tissue.
I worked really hard testing & preparing for that supervisors position & it was sad for me to leave.
I had to...
for me.
Ive also made some personal changes as I shared in recent posts about not people pleasing or competing in blogland & Ive learned some good lessons there....
Then this crazy turn of events of & after writing for Barbara Sinors book,(Tales of Addiction & stories of inspiration) then being featured in "Recovering The Self" this coming October, & then as if that wasnt enough... the follow up invite/offer to write as a regular contributor there, well its just taken on a momentum of its own.
During all of these changes, Ive put my creating dolls & painting on the back burner & I realized some of my meloncholy that I couldnt identify with all this other good stuff happening...came from a place of discontent. I LOVE creating dolls. Its what makes my heart beat a little faster, its what gives me a sense of identity & purpous especially in a time of changing seasons, calendar wise & metaphorically speaking.
So Im trying to incorporate both passions into my life without having to put one or the other down. Writing as much as I do, & the editing, & more editing...well its not as easy as some may think. Especially being the perfectionist that I am.
maybe not perfectionist,
Im no Jodi Picoult,
surely no Anita Shreve....
but I am a really intense...I mean.... passionate woman.
The whole time I was worried about who I was & where I fit this big olde scary world, God gently...
ok... sometimes...ok... MOST of the time... PUSHES me into doing some really uncomfortable stuff...
I ask Him to bless me indeed...increase my territory...& He does...then I act all confused & overwhelmed...
Poor God.
So as I sat outside fighting them mosquitos & moths, I realized I dont have a thing in the world to worry about.
Gods GOT this. from start to finish. Do I worry that my husbands been out of work? Do I worry cuz Im unable to work outside of the home right now? Or that Im facing some health issues in addition to possibly a 3d surgery on my deformed & painful thumb??? nahhhh, not anymore...
Ill type with my nose & paint with my toes if need be.
Im convinced this has all been already worked out for my highest good.
I can hear God chuckling sayin..."Dont trip tater chip"
I just wish Hed do something about them skeeters!


Renna said...

It sounds like you're in a very good place, internally, Kat. When we're grounded in God, we can trust Him with all the details. I love the Message version of Matthew 6:33.

If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.

kat449 said...

Thank you Renna & Miss Barbara for the lovely messages. One public & one private...I think I need to "edit" or correct myself. it did sound as if I was complaining of someone pushing me to do something Im not comfortable doing...well I meant God was..not any outside enterprize or persons..Sometimes I need to be pushed to do the things that are good but not necessarily comfortable. But thank you for the comments. I "am" in a place of peace.

Treasures Of Time said...

This is my first time on your blog and friends on facebook. I agree with you God has it all worked out.
One day one step at a time.