My Blog List

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Sufficient Grace

Im pretty proud of myself for finally completing this picnic basket I found on one of my flea market hunts this past summer, (Renee Mullins design) in fact, it gave me so much trouble when I first tried sealing it with the wood not wanting to soak up anything even after some serious sanding...I base coated it, & put it away for 3 weeks.
I hate admitting defeat, so needing some distraction from some personal panic I was feeling, I picked it up last week & mannnnnnnnnnn...I cant believe the cussin flyin out of my sailor mouth.
I was expecting Opie to put his paws over his ears while he sat there looking at me as if to say..."When did SHE join the Navy with that mouth?"
Yeah... all this swearing while sportin a sweatshirt saying..."Peace Happens"
Im an idiot.
Then I painted this sweet winter scene from my recent issue of Create N Decorate that one of my dear friends surprized me with, on a piece of duck cloth & made a little pillow to tuck somewhere to celebrate winter. Its a design by Kathryn Wrona. Im not generally good with snowy scenes but Im pleased with this piece Im giving to a friend for Christmas.
Peace DID happen while painting this.
I titled this blog entry Sufficient Grace for a reminder to myself that no matter what kind of fears Im facing, Christs Grace is ALWAYS sufficient for me. I...we...will be taken care of.
My panic is the size of a monster because whenever the Surgeon calls, Ronnie will be going in for Hernia surgery this coming week.
Yes, before Christmas
& no, no health insurance,
and no... to sick pay.....
No weapon formed against us shall prosper.
I am grateful we found a wonderful clinic not concerned about one more American without health insurance, only in the finding a solution to make them well again.
The care we are recieving while going thru this is probably better than some of the care weve had when we did have pricey private insurance.....see? His Grace is indeed sufficient.
I am grateful my poor husband is pain free (with the help of some good pain meds) & although hes unable to work until after he heals from this surgery, he is not in pain today. After not having anything in his system for so many years, needless to say they hit him like a tank, I knew cuz he was professing his appreciation & gratitude for me for the past 21 years...and then he got the munchies, & was laughing hysterically....for COMMERCIALS on tv!!!!
Dude.....really? hes such a cheap date....after hearing his speech about his undying love for me, Im thinkin I may slip him a mickey when this is all said & due for a referesher....
Im just sayin, a girls gotta do.....
Back to my gratitude list....
We have a beautiful twinkling Christmas tree to remind us of the real reason for this season.
We will be eating again today, we will be sleeping in a warm house with clean sheets & quilts (cuz its Saturday & its laundry day)
We have each other,
our pets,
our friends and sons who check in on us daily & keep us in prayers & much laughter.
I feel powerless because since my own issues with pain & weakness in my thumb, Im unable to work even part time to help us out. I do however have an appt. with my attorney this Monday after having an Independent Medical Exam last week & he cant even begin to rate my disability until this is this point I have a 100% disability & Im hoping my attorney will have information about a new Workmans Comp doctor so I can have the 3d surgery I so desperately need & get my quality of life back including a stable income. Im so discourgared since a couple of months ago my thumb began curling into my palm & it hurts to straighten it back out.....
this cant be good.
So Ive written out all of my Christmas cards, but I cant justify the 20 bucks for 2 or more books of stamps Ill need.
Ive got bigger fish to fry.
like Christmas dinner, scripts Ronnie will need after surgery...gas for the truck, etc....
My perspective has taken quite the turn after seeing my husband in so much pain, & feeling so scared that he wont be able to provide for us while he waits for surgery & afterwards & the time to recover.
I keep going to extra meetings, I stay closely connected to my prayer warrior sisters who never insult me with pity but with words & acts of love & encouragement even when I cant possibly afford to keep up with the bake offs, Christmas parties, shopping, or the usual festivities I used to think were the end all & be all to being worthy to self & others...
I was sadly mistaken.....
Babbling phone calls to Natalie, talking to our son, snuggling up to Ronnie while stitching & watching tv together with Opie competing for our attention... Praying for our group members on Friday mornings that not only do they remain clean & sober during their first Christmas, which can be stressful, sometimes family-less-ness holiday....but embrace the beauty of friendship.
Im so grateful theyve blessed me with theirs....
may we all believe that
"those" are our real blessings,
The real spirit of Christs Grace.
People are our blessings,
not things.
Thanks for being one of mine.


Renna said...

I'm so sorry you guys are having to go through all this, and right here at Christmas, especially. It's so uplifting to hear you share of what the really important things are, and the blessings that they are (a home, family, friends). God is your heavenly Daddy, and He knows your needs.

Cinlyn said...

Hey Kat...know that you & yours are in my thoughts and prayers!
God IS good and he will provide! Wishing you a Merry Christmas and many blessings in this coming new year!

Kat said...

Thanks (((Renna)) & (((Cindy))))
Im ok really... I am, just projecting some fears, when ya bring them to the light., they lose their power...thank you both for your prayers, they are indeed greatly appreciated & make me feel extra loved.

Debbie S. said...

I love the style of crafts you make! That is my style - primitive.

Sounds like you're in the middle of some tough times, but it also sounds like you know the Master:)

Keep focused on HIM and his grace will be sufficient.

Blessings to you!


Tina said...

Kat, I just had to stop by this morning and catch up with you. How sweet it was to get your comment and I wanted to thank you for your faithful prayers. So sorry that you've been suffering. Saying a prayer for you right now. Blessings to you, T

The Olde Crow said...

God is so good. He wrapped me in the loving arms of good friends when I was in my darkest hour. I have no family, unemployment has run out and I am in jeopardy of being homeless. If it wasn't for friends helping out with food and medicine... But I just keep on praying!!